What's missing?

By virtually any standard, I am a geek. I am OK with that. I have embraced my geekiness. I think everybody is a geek about something. Whether it's your unnatural fascination with Bob Stoops or the fact that all your cups have to be stacked a certain way in the cupboard, we are geeky people.

One of the things that I am geeky about is puzzles. I would not consider myself proficient with puzzles, but I do enjoy the challenge. I have been digging out some old puzzles, & had a couple that were missing the picture. This might not seem like much to you, but if you have ever tried to put together a puzzle without knowing what it's supposed to look like, you know how tough this can be.

I started the puzzle around 8pm. I thought that I would work on it & leave it for later. I had gotten quite a bit done when I realized it was almost midnight. I decided to continue to pursue this noble challenge a lit longer. I was almost done & I thought that if I left it until tomorrow, it would surely have been destroyed by some unnamed 4 year old.

As it neared completion, I realized something. I was missing a piece. Again, this might not seem like much to you. But after maniacally working on this puzzle for 6 hours, I was about to be denied the satisfaction of completing it.

When I was thinking about the puzzle after I had gone to bed, (pathetic, I know) I couldn't help but think about the Jewish word Shalom. Shalom is a word that we have translated as peace, but it actually has a much deeper meaning. It means "complete" or "whole". When you think about that, it amazes me because Jesus didn't come to just to make me feel better. He came to make me whole. He is not just the Prince of Peace, but the Prince of Completion. He came so that there would be nothing lacking from my life.

When I looked at this puzzle it reminded me of something. Sometimes we feel that we are putting the scattered pieces of our lives together without a picture for reference. This is more than difficult, it can be discouraging & frustrating. We feel like it's our responsibility to make the pieces fit. The good news is, God sees the big picture & knows where everything goes. It's not our responsibility to put things together, it's our responsibility to follow God's direction.

God wants you to experience his wholeness, but that doesn't mean that everything will be perfect. It means that we might not have all the pieces & we're OK with that. It means that we will trust God to put things together instead of trying to do it ourselves. It means that sometimes it will seem like there's a missing piece even though God just hasn't put it in place yet.

What's missing from your life? Are you trying to do things yourself? Trust God to give you Shalom.

By the way, about 15 minutes after I finished the puzzle I found the missing piece under the table. That may be another blog someday.

Follow me?

This morning I was reading John 13. Jesus is talking to the disciples & trying to describe what was about to happen. In hindsight, it seems clear what he was trying to communicate, but the disciples had a different mindset, so they couldn't really comprehend what he was talking about. Jesus was trying to tell them about what they should expect.

In verse 36, Peter asks, "Lord, where are you going?" Jesus replied, "You can't now follow me where I'm going. You will follow later."

It's interesting that the same words that Jesus uses here are the same words used he used to call Peter in Matthew 4, "Follow me". In that instance Peter laid down his nets & followed Jesus. This was a huge change for this man, but it was an outward change. He changed his habits & daily activities. We see that he swore oaths & allegiances to Jesus that he broke miserably. After he denied Christ for the 3rd time & heard the rooster, he was a shattered man. He had vowed to follow Jesus even unto death & he had come to the end of himself.

I continue to struggle to understand Jesus' upside down rules. The last will be first or you must lose your life to truly gain it. But as Peter found out, Jesus doesn't love us more when we seem like we have everything together, he loves us most when we are at our lowest. When our lives have been shattered by failure.

In Matthew 4, Peter was ready to follow Jesus, but not all the way to the cross. It was commitment that was based on the five senses. What he experienced with Jesus made him want to follow. Jesus said in John 13, you're not ready to follow me where I'm going. It was a statement that caught Peter off guard. He was a little indignant & was probably hurt by the declaration.

The things that prepared Peter for what was to come was perspective & most importantly, the Holy Spirit. Peter's paradigm shifted after the death & resurrection of Jesus. He originally thought that he would help govern an earthly Kingdom with Jesus someday, but that's not what Jesus intended. He realized that his journey was not leading him where he originally planned, & he was at peace with that.

How many times in my life have I wanted something & God has said, "Not yet. You're not ready." Doesn't God know who I am or what I have planned? Doesn't he understand that I have big plans & there are things that I want to see done? Sometimes I have to understand that I am not ready for the next leg of the journey just yet, that God is doing something in or around me that I don't yet understand.

All of my vows or oaths are in vain because I don't have the power to fulfill them. But when I come to the end of myself, I am in perfect position to receive from the Holy Spirit & through him I am able to follow.

Who are you following & are you ready to follow wherever the journey may lead?